Category Archives: Unpopular Opinion

To the Bystanders

Today is the last day of Domestic Violence Awareness Month and I promised to write something. Waiting all month, however, meant that people already wrote just about everything there was to write about DV already. So, I’d like to invite y’all to dig a little deeper and discuss something that’s often overlooked. Sometimes, the worst part about being in an abusive relationship is the people surrounding you.

Now, don’t get me wrong, the abuser is always the biggest bad guy (or gal or person). I’ve been in three abusive relationships and I say without a lick of shame that I am patiently waiting for my abusers to die a very unpleasant death so I can show up to their funerals with a smile on my face and a “Bye, Satan!” sign to wave in the air. Their cruelty is unmatched and I’m sure most victims would feel the same about their abusers as well. What they may also feel but not vocalize is how the people on the outside of the relationship made them feel.

When you’re in an abusive relationship, you may see people act 1 of 3 ways toward you (directly or indirectly). They tend to deny, ignore, or blame. Let’s discuss. Read the rest of this entry

Your Faves, Consent, and Never-Ending Trauma

Trigger Warning: Sexual abuse, suicide, slut-shaming Read the rest of this entry

Friendly Allies vs. Unchecked Foes

The Pacific Northwest is really white. How white? Well…..

Untitled

Having lived in this sea of whiteness the majority of my life, I’ve had to face many battles with white supremacy. Being called “nigger” by a white relative, people avoiding elevator rides or sitting next to me on the bus, hair touching, work place discrimination, and all the microagressions in between. I also have to deal with a great deal of closeted racism that has gone unchecked due to the lack of non-whites the white folks here interact with. I don’t know. It might not be a regional thing. But it sure feels like it sometimes. I don’t know how else to explain it. Read the rest of this entry

Enough is Enough

Portland Public Schools is currently examining issues of inequity, looking to re-balance schools across the city. An advisory committee was formed and with community input, plan to guide the school board toward a solution.

When I went to Harriet Tubman Middle School we had a marine biology program. I took zoology. We dissected animals. We had Bunsen burners in more than one classroom. We had a dark room where we developed our own pictures from the cameras we made. We had two PE teachers, but I was able to opt out of PE and take dance instead. I felt like my opportunities were endless. My children will not have those same opportunities at Boise-Eliot/Humboldt. There are limited classrooms to share with 10 grade levels. The PE teacher is forced to teach 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, and 14 year olds in the same room. The same room where they have 15 minutes a day to eat lunch. The same room where they hold assemblies. And that is just a small piece of the problematic puzzle. Like many other (P)K-8s in the city, Boise-Eliot/Humboldt is not okay Read the rest of this entry

Throwback Thursday: Oh SNAP!

Hey y’all! It’s been a long while. I decided to repost this blog I wrote back in 2012 in light of conversations about limiting those who receive food stamps. This time around, the controversy is whether or not they should be able to buy steak and seafood and I just wanted to share this in light. Please note that the dollar amounts may be 3 years old but most of the information is relatively comparable. Read the rest of this entry

So, About That Wage Gap…..

“It’s time for women. Equal means equal. The truth is the older women get, the less money they make. The highest percentage of children living in poverty are in female-headed households. It’s inexcusable that we go around the world and we talk about equal rights for women in other countries and we don’t…..It’s time for all the women in America, and all the men that love women and all the gay people and all the people of color that we’ve all fought for to fight for us now.” – Patricia Arquette
Source: Time

If you haven’t heard, there’s a big fuss over Miss Arquette’s speech at the Oscars last night. So much fuss that the above referenced article from Time.com is asking everyone to stop giving her a hard time because of it. That said, I won’t give her a hard time. I won’t even address her. I will simply explain why what she said upset so many people(other than the implicit tone that the fight gays and people of color has ended). And don’t worry, this will be short sweet and to the point. Read the rest of this entry

Black Dopeness: A Poetic Piece of Prose

Why are you so bothered by my existence?
Why

The more I love me
The more you hate me for it
The more I succeed
The more you want to see me fail Read the rest of this entry

Cop Killers vs. Killer Cops

It’s always fascinating to see how quickly blame shifts. As soon as there is an opportunity to point and say “Well look at what they did,” the weak and irresponsible pounce. It’s like with my kids. My son will do something wrong to my daughter and get in trouble but as soon as he finds something she’s done wrong he starts the, “But Payton did…” blues. Mind you, they are 6 and 7, but grown folks use the same tactics.

This weekend I heard of a Black man shooting two police officers and I knew what would follow. Blame shift city. Suddenly the anti-police brutality protestors are to blame for the shooting. A shooting only one man committed. But like all groups of people, when there is a threat to few, the whole gets defensive and wants to protect themselves from suffering the same plight. It’s natural. Read the rest of this entry

Destroying Christmas, One Crappy Song at a Time

How to be a Better Rapper

So, you wanna be a successful rapper? Regardless of how you choose to measure your personal success, I’m pretty sure a part of it is getting people to listen to your music and like it. Some of y’all think that means spending hours on end in the studio recording dope tracks. But there are a few things you need to do before investing the profit you made from that pound of weed you sold into studio time. Read the rest of this entry